I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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