I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
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