Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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