We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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