Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize