wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
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I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
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I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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