Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize