My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i think i have herpe
just one?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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