We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize