And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize