I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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