Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize