I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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