dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
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