So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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