You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I'm passing your future prison.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
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St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
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I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize