We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
sex in a hospital.. check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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