Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
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well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
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just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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