"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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