it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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