I wanna bring you to show and tell
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
My ass is underappreciated
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
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