I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize