got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize