Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
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