i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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