Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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