Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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