he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
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Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
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For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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