I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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