hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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