Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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