You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize