btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize