so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
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