dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize