Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
The power of my boobs compel you
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize