So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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