It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize