I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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