You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
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