and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize