I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize