I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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