come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
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