I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
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All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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