Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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