I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize