my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize