I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize