it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize